…and the Philosoraptors have bared their canines.
The disemboweled remains of what is believed to be a horse of Trojan manufacture were found on the doorstep of the Classics Department this morning. The carcass was accompanied by what appears to be a page from an epic tale recounting a centuries-long battle between a race known as the Ancients, and a breed known as the Philosoraptors. The existence of this work had long been rumored, but this page is the first evidence of its actual existence. Papyrologists will begin work to authenticate the manuscript this summer, a complete copy of which can be found here. 0806_001
It is believed that the recent rise in tension between the two normally-peaceable departments is linked to the Fifth Annual Classics-Philosophy Kickball Smackdown, an annual battle that has, in the past four years, resulted in a schooling for pupils of the School of Athens. (Translation: Philosophy always wins.)
Spectators are welcome at this year’s event, which will take place somewhere on the south end of campus around 4 p.m. on Thursday, Reading Day.